Ten Ways Being a Geek Makes You Less Attractive
One of my friends showed me this article titled Ten Ways Being a Geek Makes You More Attractive. It left me very confused. It compelled me to do the right thing: to debunk these crazy accusations.
1. You’re probably very smart.
This guy has obviously never been a geek. Intelligence isn’t attractive; muscles are. Knowing Pi to 314 digits: No. Six-packs: Yes. Both: No.
2. It’s hip to be geek
Geeks don’t like other people. It’s why they dress so badly. Repelling others means more time to code. They just got lucky that T-shirts and jeans are currently à la mode.
3. You geek out on more than just your computer
Geeks also geek out on Star Trek collections, Warhammer figurines, and Pokemon decks.
4. Geek humor is the best humor.
The only requirement is that you have to be of equal geekity to understand the jokes. They go on the lines of: There are 10 kinds of people in the world: those who are attractive and those who aren’t. (If you get this, you are truly a geek.)
5. You listen to good music.
They listen to good music while the guy with the guitar next door is getting busy.
6. You make good money.
More money for computer parts, Star Trek collections, Warhammer figurines, and Pokemon decks! In all seriousness, geeks like girls who don’t care about money, which is exactly why they fail.
7. You fix stuff.
For free. That makes them slightly worse than servants. Some genuinely want to help, most have ulterior motives.
8. You’ve got your own stuff going on.
Computer parts, Star Trek collections, Warhammer figurines, and Pokemon decks. Dude, everyone has stuff going on, not just geeks.
9. You’re very articulate.
Last time I checked, many bloggers can’t tell the difference between its and it’s, their and they’re, your and you’re, then and than. The worst part is that no one actually calls people out on these flagrant errors and so the Internet is further polluted with bad grammar on a daily basis.
10. You’re passionate.
Computer parts, Star Trek collections, Warhammer figurines, and Pokemon decks. The geek’s downfall? Thinking he’s better than everyone else.
Geeks despise being attractive, and most of them have gone to great lengths (most of their lifetimes) to make sure that it never happens, so please don’t take that away from them.